GRACE

As I look back over the years since I accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior, I have seen many things(in myself). I have been judgmental, always having something to say. I have been in error at times with interpretations and misconceptions. I have be hypocritical without knowing because of lack of discernment and discipleship. I have glimpsed at and exercised "extra-biblical" matters that were incorrect. I have denied Christ in the decisions I have made and have been guilty of conforming to the world instead of being transformed by the renewing of my mind.

But, as the years have passed, now almost 8 years since my awakening. I have come along way. I have become wiser, not according to worldly wisdom. No longer always having an opinion, but using the Word of God as a lamp to my feet and a light to my path. I am more compassionate and forgiving. My lamp is not hidden under the table but on the lamp stand for all to see. I can discern truth from error and I can hold myself, along with my brothers and sisters accountable with LOVE. I understand my freedom in Christ and I know how to not do anything in EXCESS.

But, I thank God for those moments, especially as a babe in Christ because it made me who I am today and who I am becoming as I type these words. It has increased my discernment, along with my study habits. It has made me a PRAYER WARRIOR! It is so freeing! I now understand what it means to thirst and hunger for righteousness while walking around in this futile shell. It has made me desire to be either hot or cold and not lukewarm, lest He spit me out of His mouth. I now can have mercy on those who fall short or who may have wronged me, while gently and carefully trying to lead them back into the race.  I can forgive even the most wicked sinners, remembering that my sins or no greater or less according to God's standards.

I can have friendships with those with different beliefs as I continually share with them the TRUTH according to ACTS 4:12. I am growing and being pruned day by day!

Its only by His GRACE!!!

DO YOU KNOW WHAT TODAY IS???

ITS OUR ANNIVERSARY!!


WHEN I FOUND OUT HE LOVED MUSIC
JUST AS MUCH AS ME, I KNEW WE
WOULD BE TOGETHER FOREVER!!


The day I ordered the Strawberry sundae

Strawberry sundaes were never my favorite. Although I love strawberries, caramel(I pronounce it Carmel)seemed to reach a place in my soul that words could not express. Like brown silk slithering down my tonsils after seeping through ever taste bud that God designed in my mouth. I loved the way it become one with the vanilla ice cream and then trapped by the drizzled nuts, sealing the deal. My grandmother on the other hand, always ordered the Strawberry sundae. I guess she had her own experience. I guess I should have mentioned, that these were the famous McDonald sundaes; the ones that are still one dollar after all these years, among other things like gas. Several times I tried to convince her to try the caramel(Ca-Ra-Mel as my husband says),but she didn't budge. I eventually gave up and without ever saying it, we agreed to disagree! That was fine because it was deeper than the sundaes anyways. When we got together it was about taking a break from "life" and sitting down for twelve minutes to enjoy each other's company. My little sister(4 years younger than me)seemed to enjoy our McDonald trips as well. We had a ritual. Grandma took us to the mall. We shopped until she dropped (on a bench here and there), and grandma always made us carry the bags, or as she would say, "Carry your troubles!" We'd sit around the table like a campfire and taste the sweet part of life.

Years passed by, I grew up, and without warning McDonald's decided to lay off some of the items on the menu or maybe like other fast food chains they had to keep up with the latest desserts. So they decided that the Caramel sundae were much better than the Strawberry. Our McDonald trips had ceased anyways because I was now a teenager out seeing the world, so I had no time for grandma or Caramel sundaes(how I regret this). In the summer of 2005 my sweet grandma took her last breath. That was around the same time that McDonald's reunited with their first love, the Strawberry sundae. I couldn't believe it!

 I remember my grandmothers viewing like it was yesterday. My uncle sitting beside me while I daydreamed. He nudged me and asked, "What are you thinking about?" I couldn't tell him that I was thinking about a strawberry sundae from McDonald's. He would think I was so selfish. He wouldn't have understood the significance behind it. When it was time for the family to give hopefully only two minutes of reflections, my legs involuntarily lifted me up and I walked up to front of the room. I grabbed the hand of my step dad to stand next to me to help calm my nerves. I shared a few words about my grandma and turned to her and told her that the Strawberry sundae was back. I hoped that God had sent her the message. that was the day I bought the Strawberry sundae, and entered into her world! It actually wasn't bad either! But that was a sad day. To some people it may seem silly or "too deep", but there a lot of experiences in life that cannot be explained. No one can take the significance of those moments from you. All I can ever do is wonder and imagine why they brought that flavor back, but it was special to me. I have to let you know that shortly after, they discontinued the Strawberry sundae!

What are the odds of that!

Martin still speaks..

His name will forever be heard in the generations to come. In the month of January, as early as preschool, the echo of his name will bounce from their ear drums for the first time as the teacher passes out his picture for them to color. They will hear the famous words, "I have a dream" and "We shall over come." They will learn a few things, maybe even watch a short film about his accomplishments leading up to his death. The children will come home dragging their backpacks on the ground with one hand and their colored picture in the other, excited to tell mommy and hopefully daddy about this man they colored today. The parents will probably say "that's nice" without even glancing at the scribbled masterpiece, and sit it down on the coffee table next to the essence magazine and ashtray. His face will slowly disappear while papers pile on top of him and the month of January quickly comes to an end. And the children who are like little sponges will dry up and move on to something else. They will never hear the rest of the story.

But even after January Martin still speaks!  He speaks through those who have not forgotten what he fought for. Little children, did you know Martin was a Christian, a Reverend? Parents, have you read his letters, speeches and sermons, how he quoted from the word of God? Amos 5:24 "But let justice roll on like a river, righteousness like a never-failing stream." Yes he also quoted Psalms 30:5,"...Weeping may stay the night, but rejoicing comes in the morning."  Even while being oppressed he preached love. Martin still speaks, while his books at the library collect dust. Martin still speaks while the search query for his name on the Internet decreases except for in January. Did you know that "our hero" had a hero and his name was Jesus. One cannot stand for love in the midst of hate unless he has experienced the intimate love of God.

I am guilty myself! For at one point, I allowed Martin's colored picture to be placed on the coffee table next to a glass of wine while 106 N Park shouted obscene language in the background. I swore I saw him crying from that page but maybe it was the wine I spilled on his face. I swore I saw his eyebrow raise from that page when I tore a piece off to jot down a phone number "real quick". Martin still speaks but only if we could turn down our foolishness and ignorance to hear him. He would scream, "We're not done yet!" Did you know in his "I Have a Dream" speech he requested some things from us. "But there is something that I must say to my people who stand on the warm threshold which leads into the palace of justice. In the process of gaining our rightful place we must not be guilty of wrongful deeds. Let us not seek to satisfy our thirst for freedom by drinking from the cup of bitterness and hatred".  He further goes to say, "We must forever conduct our struggle on the high plane of dignity and discipline."

Martin would still be speaking, but instead to us more than anyone because we have not fulfilled his wishes. He didn't ask much of us. If you are reading this I encourage you to take a look closer at one of his speeches or letter from Jail really dig in for yourself, get the meat of it, eat it, chew it, digest it. And it will ultimately lead you to the one on who's behalf he spoke. Happy birthday Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

I believe he would have one more thing to say...
"Pull up your pants!"

A mother's job is never done!

Hello world! Its morning!! Thanks so much for coming to my page and letting me share a little piece of my life with you. Here is my first official short story for this blog. I hope you find it entertaining and a great way to start your day!

My eyes flew open as if my alarm clock had overslept and I was late for work. Instead of rising to its annoying call to “wake up”, I was greeted by a five letter word spoken fast, five times. “Mommy! Mommy! Mommy! Mommy! Mommy!” On average it’s usually twice, but since I hid the top of my eyelids just beneath the cover, hoping to savor five more minutes of sleep, my son decided to continue until I gave in. He won that battle. I couldn’t stand another millisecond of his cute five year old voice.  You know, it doesn’t matter what type of sound you set your alarm to. Whether it’s waterfalls, rain or the sound of birds chirping, after about three days it all sounds the same and reminds you that you have to get up and fulfill your responsibilities. Without looking, I reached for my eyes (my glasses) and then peeled back the covers to find my sock that magically slid off my foot during the night. The whole time my five year old alarm clock is telling me, what seems like his whole life story in the tongues of Charlie Browns teacher. He thrusts me from the bed with his feet and we both head west to check on “brother”.

“Wake up Elijah”, Khalil and I yelled in unison. This was never an easy task, and definitely not a “one-man Job”. See, Elijah likes to stay up all night and watch Untold Stories of the ER. Most kids fall asleep to Sponge Bob or Full House, but Elijah cannot sleep until he finds out how the Doctor will get that crowbar out of that guy’s head! So mornings are very interesting in our house and they are not his favorite time of the day. After the second call for him to wake up, we begin removing the covers while standing back like he was a Lion awakening from a tranquilizer. Elijah was mean in the morning. He did not want to wake up for anyone, but once he stretched his little limbs in every possible direction, he’d rise up and we’d finally head to the living room. Khalil was a walking waffle eater, while Elijah liked to eat breakfast at school or not at all. I glance at the clock on the oven to see how much time I have to work with and it reads 7:02am. School starts at 8am for Elijah and 8:10am for Khalil so my goal is to be in the car by 7:45am. You never thought your brain could work so hard until you have to strategize how to dress two grade school boys, along with yourself, make lunches and do everything else that comes with a typical morning.

“Mom, I’m done with my responsibilities, can I play the game” This was their question every morning (what have we allowed our kids to become? That is another topic for another day).
Elijah stood there in his over-sized WWE sweat jacket. John Cena’s hat now read, “….C ME” John would be appalled! He wanted to wear that jacket every day because he thought it made him the coolest kid that stepped to the Tether ball game. We’d go toe-to-toe about that jacket and he’d give an answer like he was on Jeopardy, as to why he should be able to wear it. “No games this morning, Elijah and go wipe that toothpaste off the perimeter of your mouth and put some lotion on your face,” I responded.  Khalil had stuffed ¾ of the waffles in his mouth and had the audacity to ask me a question like I would be able to understand him. He asked if he could play the game (after a while I learned how to interpret stuffed mouths) as if my answer would be different for him. “No Khalil, didn’t you just hear what I told your brother?” “Well, mom Mrs. Frew said if you want something all you have to do is say please” ,He assured. “Well, son, Mrs. Frew is right about using your manners, but in this house what I say goes and just because you say please doesn’t mean you can have your way!” He won the first battle and I won this one!  He gulped down that whole waffle down his skinny throat and shot to the bathroom like a rocket, to do his responsibilities. I glanced at the clock on the Microwave hoping it was slower than the one on the Oven and it read 7:17am. This has got to be a conspiracy I thought, it was just 7:02am. I hurried and wrapped their chips in foil (we’ve all used foil before) since there were no more sandwich bags, and grabbed my lukewarm coffee and headed to the back.

Water is running, TV’s and lights are on. As usual Khalil is following me closer than my own shadow, begging me to tie his shoes. “Go ask your brother”, was my normal response. Khalil had recently learned to tie his shoes, but was not satisfied that he wasn’t a “double knotter” yet. Thank God for uniforms because I don’t know what the morning would be like without them. Khalil gets dressed different than normal people. He starts from the bottom up. Socks, pants and untied shoes, then he shows off his baby abs until I find a shirt that has no stains on it! Meanwhile, Elijah is always the first one dressed, looking GQ in front of the Television. He yells, “Mom, where do I find Stories of the ER on On Demand?” I couldn’t believe it was 7:27am. I still had to brush my teeth, wash my face and comb my hair and figure out what I was going to wear. On Sunday evenings I swore by my favorite lip gloss that I would get my clothes for the week out. But that was still on my bucket list along with swimming with dolphins. The only thing I knew I was wearing was a jacket and scarf because it was freezing outside. Don’t let women fool you, it doesn’t always take hours for us to get ready. We can go from Godzilla to Miss America in 60 seconds if we have to. This morning I did it in fifty nine! After I thought of all this, it was 7:39am and my heart was pumping like Pepe Le Pew when he saw his crush. Khalil was still waiting for me to tie his shoes. I guess he wasn’t impressed with Elijah’s “Bunny ear technique”, so I bent down to double knot his favorite shoes and at 7:49am we headed out to the car.

“Khalil can you pray for us this morning?” I asked, as I made eye contact through the rear view mirror. He begins, ”Dear God thank you for this day, thank you for my mom, my dad and my brother. Thank you that no one broke in last night. Jesus lives in our heart and the Holy Spirit. I hope we get to play outside today. God made everything. I hope we get to play the game when we get home. In Jesus name. Amen!”

And one by one I drop them off to two different schools (long story). I watch as they enter their classrooms making sure the door completely closes behind them before pulling off. I turn on the Steve Harvey morning show as my heart rate returns back to its normal rhythm and I cruise onto Highway 4 to begin my next shift!

 

Its Morning!!

For the past year, morning has been my favorite time of the day. I don't know what I like best, the enticing aroma of fresh dark coffee lingering under my nostrils, or the rush of crisp air that greets my face, making my eyes water. There is something refreshing about the morning; something new and unknown about what lies ahead.

At times we go to bed carrying the load of the day with us along  with its anxieties and disappointments. But from the moment we open our eyes, although our circumstances may not have changed(yet), at the very least it promises us a possibility of hope.

 "Today might be the day"! Today may be the day you do what you've always wanted to do. Maybe you'll start writing your book, start exercising, or call an old friend or relative. Maybe you'll enroll in school or pick up an old brush and finish a painting. Maybe you'll meet a friend over tea, perhaps meet the love of your life or simply have a relaxing day with no obligations!

 Each morning there is a new page being written in our story. Yesterday is history and cannot be edited. Tomorrow is not promised, though it certainly will come but possibly without you.

So if you're reading this be grateful because....Its morning!